*From "Napoleon Dynamite," my new favorite movie, in reference to his grandmother's llama.
I seriously think I was on a diet of about 8,000 calories per day while I was on vacation. If food was out, I was eating it. And Wisconsin has so many good things to eat, besides all the cheese.
They have: Kringles, a sort of pastry with scrumptious almond and sugar filling; Culvers, home of the Butterburger; Kopps frozen custard and some of the planet's best french fries; there are several PF Chang's scattered around. And what did I do? I gorged on all of it.
One night, I was walking downstairs in my sister-in-law's house and thought to myself, "God, I'm just walking down a flight of stairs. Why is my ass bouncing around so much?" Could it be, oh, let's see here...THE FOOD YOU'VE BEEN SHOVELLING INTO YOUR FACE FOR TWO WEEKS?
Sigh..fun time is over. I am officially on a slim-down/exercise 'till it hurts program. I can't go on like this, much as I want to. I no longer have the metabolism of a twenty year-old. And how can I forget all the trauma my mother put me through when her ass is following me through my life?